Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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