My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
