Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
