he looks like a really good dad on facebook
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
