I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Randomize
