yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
