I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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