She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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