i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
