is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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