it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
