I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
