i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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