is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Dicks are not precious.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
