didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize