And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
