Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
