Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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