Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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