So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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