So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I think people are normalizing furries
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
