Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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