As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
