using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
