is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
