I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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