Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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