Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
