Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
