u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
