I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
