I wish I could punch you in the face.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
