whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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