I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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