Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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