i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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