Kiss
Puke
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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