at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
