He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
COCAINE IS GR8
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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