chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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