So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
