Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
