Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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