i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
