she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Randomize