pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
high people should be assigned attendants
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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