Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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