Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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