But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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