Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
